Well. How about this one, from an essay about cats?
A cat, I realize, cannot be everyone’s cup of fur.
Or this one, from an essay about sports and other obsessions:
I have been told there are people who wig out on pasta.
Or this one, about … guess:
When I was a boy, it occurs to me now, I always had one or another kind of hat.
Or:
Juggling today appears to be undergoing a small renaissance.
Or:
If one is looking to save on fuel bills, politics is likely to heat up a room quicker than just about anything else.
Last one:
In tennis I was most notable for flipping and catching my racket in various snappy routines.
The essays are, by and large, as tweedy and self-satisfied as these lines make them sound. There are no wild hairs in them, no sudden deepenings of tone. Nothing is at stake. We are stranded with him on the putt-putt course.
Epstein fills his essays with quotation after quotation, as ballast. I am a fan of well-deployed, free-range quotations. So many of Epstein’s are musty and reek of Bartlett’s. They are from figures like Lord Chesterfield and Lady Mary Montagu and Sir Herbert Grierson and Tocqueville and Walpole and Carlyle. You can feel the moths escaping from the display case in real time.
To be fair, I circled a few sentences in “Familiarity Breeds Content” happily. I’m with him on his distrust of “fun couples.” He writes, “A cowboy without a hat is suitable only for bartending.” I liked his observation, which he borrowed from someone else, that a career has five stages:
(1) Who is Joseph Epstein? (2) Get me Joseph Epstein. (3) We need someone like Joseph Epstein. (4) What we need is a young Joseph Epstein. (5) Who is Joseph Epstein?
It’s no fun to trip up a writer on what might have been a late-career victory lap. Epstein doesn’t need me to like his work. He’s published more than 30 books, and you can’t do that unless you’ve made a lot of readers happy.
NEVER SAY YOU’VE HAD A LUCKY LIFE: Especially If You’ve Had a Lucky Life | By Joseph Epstein | Free Press | 287 pp. | $29.99
FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTENT: New and Selected Essays | By Joseph Epstein | Simon & Schuster | 441 pp. | Paperback, $20.99
