Lola D. Smith | Provided
Monday, July 8, 2024 || By Michael Romain || michael@wearejohnwilk.com
In a recent interview, Maywood native Lola D. Smith said she’s always wanted to write a book. Originally, she thought she’d write a memoir. That plan changed when her husband, Joseph E. Smith, died at 41 in 2018.
Smith’s new book, “Mending Masculine Hearts: Navigating Trauma, Love, and Relationships,” details her late husband’s mental health challenges, her struggle navigating those challenges while raising a family, and her road to healing the wounds left in the wake of his death.
Smith, who lives in Villa Park, released the book in June for Men’s Health Month. She’s hosting a book launch event on Sunday, July 14, from 4 to 6 p.m., at White Smoke & Ash, 2301 Plainfield Rd. in Crest Hill.
Can you talk a bit more about your husband’s mental health challenges?
I had been preparing to leave him for three years, but he didn’t know that until maybe about eight months before his passing. That was a trigger and that’s when I started seeing things go downhill.
I was still trying to take care of him, but he didn’t want help. When I would try to get him to seek a doctor, he was afraid, thinking that the doctors were going to hurt him. It was a horrific experience I didn’t see coming. I realized that in that three-year span, I thought I was leaving my husband, but God was preparing me for what would eventually happen.
How long were you all together?
We were together for over 20 years. Throughout our relationship, I would tell him your pride will kill you. He wouldn’t deal with his emotional trauma and baggage — the trauma he dealt with from his parents, and his sister, he didn’t want to deal with that. He harbored those things and in the end, I saw them play out in his mental. He lost his mind in the blink of an eye.
How did your husband die?
They said it was pneumonia, but I think that the trauma had stirred up so many things within his body in the form of diseases. He had an enlarged heart and thyroid disease [among other health issues] when he passed.
What do you want the impact of your book to be?
I hope this book will be a source of power and strength for anyone seeking healing, love, and encouragement to confront their unspoken pain. I hope people of all cultures read this book, but I particularly want people in the Black community to use it to reclaim the abundant love and joy that rightfully belongs to us. I want it to empower our people.
For more information on Lola Smith and her book, visit instagram.com/loveoflostarts_. You can purchase the book on Amazon at a.co/d/4Xv92eb.
